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Joke of the Day

"Chuck Norris does not own a stove, oven, or microwave , because revenge is a dish best served cold."

"Wanna hear a joke? Sanctity of marriage. OH!"

"One time I described myself as ""laid back"" and a dictionary became sentient and told me to learn what words mean"

"Ate reduced fat cheese on low calorie bread and my taste buds had me indicted for hate crimes."

"Nigel Farage walks into a bar Convinces the patrons to set it on fire, and then leaves."

"Why do chicken coops only have two doors? Because if they had four they'd be called chicken sedans!"

"Why do midgets laugh while running through the yard? Because the grass tickles their nuts..."

"Most guys that think they know everything about women usually lack one thing.... A woman."

"I think calling them maggots is insensitive... they should be referred to as larvasexuals."

"There is no dialog in the first half-an-hour of Mad Max:Fury Road...(no spoilers) ...'cept all the blacks yip-yappin' in the theater."