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Joke of the Day
"I seemed to have lost all my vegetable puns I hope they turnip somewhere"
Next Joke
"A woman drives into a bar."
"Based on the condition of my hair in the morning, I'd say there's a 100% chance my hair has more fun than I do when I sleep."
"What's the only thing that grows in Ferguson? The crime rate."
"The Chinese New Year is almost here. I know they're in another time zone, but 2 months behind seems a little extreme."
"Worst idea you'll ever have is oiling your 4 year-old's squeaky bedroom door. Congratulations, you just made a ninja."
"Never date a philosophy major My last girlfriend was one and she spent most of her time trying to prove that I didn't exist"
"I once met a prostitute that said she would do anything for $100 I said paint my house."
"Why cant Ray Charles see his friends? Because he's ~~Blind~~ Married"
"If you have sex with a prostitute while she's passed out, is it rape? Or shoplifting?"