199614
Joke of the Day
"Will carrying a torch save you from an attacking bear? Depends on how fast you can carry it."
Next Joke
"A fruit probably wouldn't travel to Australia But a veggie might"
"Beetlejuice 2 has been announced and is bringing Keaton back but without Winona... They were afraid she'd steal the show. /me drops the mic and walks off stage waving a pop tart"
"What's red like a strawberry, hard like beef jerky, smells like vinegar, and is found under your bed? Me neither. Help."
"When I was younger, I was so stupid, I made bad decisions that will haunt me for the rest of my life. And by ""younger"" I mean yesterday."
"Two fish swim into a wall One looks at the other and says *""Dam!""* #oldbutgold"
"I hurt my shoulder and doctor told me i shouldn't lift anything heavy. So i'm forced to sit down when i pee."
"What does a sick train say? Achoo Achoo!"
"How many boring guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? One"
"I wish they had an app that allows you to delete your number from other ppl's phones."