199519

Joke of the Day

"""How about a month of obligations, overspending, difficult travel and horrible weather?"" - The pitch for the month of December."

"LIFE is just a game of Monopoly and RISK."

"Is that a Higgs boson in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"

"What do you call a gorilla with a harpsichord? A silverbach."

"I don't know why I broke up with the gym... ..I guess we just weren't working out."

"Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken."

"If you let Jesus take the wheel... Does that count as ghost riding the whip?"

"Knock Knock Knock knock. Who's there? To. To who? To whom."

"You're spending a lot of time at that computer screen. Have you had your eyes checked? No they've always been blue!"

"The only thing standing between you and your dreams is insomnia."