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Joke of the Day

"Old man first world problem I can't use a fleshlight without first using viagara"

"What did the cheese vendor say to the robber? ""Hey! That's nacho cheese!"""

"1. Be born of a virgin 2. Walk on water 3. Get crucified 4. Return from the dead 5. ??? 6: Prophet"

"Karen on Facebook says, ""2014 is going sooooo well!"" Personally, I've already fcuked up 2014, and a good chunk of 2015, so go fcuk yourself Karen."

"After just starting uni, I have decided I don't like referencing. I don't like it et al."

"I always go the extra mile at work. That's why I'm a terrible taxi driver."

"The entire city of Detroit burned down last night. Estimated damage is $6."

"What do skeletons like to put on their meat? Grave-y."

"How many men escaped the destruction of Sodom? A Lot."

"The problem with traveling into the future is that it's hard to determine the date because newspapers no longer exist."