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Joke of the Day

"It must be hard to judge a wet t-shirt contest. I saw one recently and all the t-shirts looked equally wet."

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"I'll never forget my Granddad's last words before he kicked the bucket. 'How far do you reckon I can kick this bucket?'"
"Why did God invent the yeast infection? To show girls what it's like to live with an annoying cunt."
"My ex-wife still misses me... ...but her aim is getting better!"
"Why did the cheeseburger fight the veggie burger? It had beef."
"What did the 0 say to the 8? ... Hey, nice belt.."
"I remember the first time I used a Universal Remote Control I thought to myself: ""Well, this changes everything."""
"A friend of mine asked if I could give her the definition of a double entendre... so I gave it to her."
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"Q: How did the blonde break her leg playing hockey with the Toronto Maple Leafs? A: She fell out of the tree."