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Joke of the Day

"Our bank manager can't ride a bike any more. Why not? He lost his balance."

"Falling vending machines kill more people per year than sharks. I've never even seen a shark near a vending machine."

"SUBWAY EMPLOYEE: would you like your receipt? ME: no thank you i don't want any proof that i've eaten here"

"What is E.T. short for? So he can fit into his spaceship."

"""Dammit, I'm more than 15 minutes late for my three o'clock."" John 3:16."

"Did you hear about the American Indian who died from drinking too much tea? He drowned in his own tepee!"

"When talking to a girl, their boobs are like the sun... You can't look at them for very long unless you have sunglasses"

"ME: I want to take long walks with you. HER: Aww...are you a romantic? ME: No, I don't have a car."

"I'm wearing nike pants so you have to just do it..."

"What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? Grab onto your nuts, this is no ordinary blow job."