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Joke of the Day

"ME: I want to take long walks with you. HER: Aww...are you a romantic? ME: No, I don't have a car."

"I Went To Purchase Some Camoflauge Clothes The Other Day But I just couldn't see myself in them."

"I bought some shoes from a drug dealer I am not sure what they were laced with but I have been tripping all day"

"How much Blow Can Charlie Sheen Do?.. ..... Enough to kill 2 and 1/2 Men"

"Babe Ruth points at a toilet, then takes a gigantic dump in it."

"Why did Microsoft name their new web browser ""Edge""? Because people familiar with the U2 guitarist of the same name are already used to long delays."

"Who is the smartest person in the world, doing the silliest thing right now? Apparently, that's you."

"My ex just followed me on Twitter. That said: ""Say hello to Hitler for me, Mary."" *BLOCKED*"

"Empty brain A: When I stand on my head the blood rushes to my head, but when I stand on my feet the blood doesn't rush to my feet. Why is this? B: It's because your feet aren't empty."

"I told you not to let those pigs In my office. Now look what's happened. They've eaten all the dates off my calendar!"