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Joke of the Day
"Knock Knock Who's there ! Borg ! Borg who ? Borg standard !"
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"How many redditors does it take to screw in a light bulb? Only one, but an extra 15 to repost."
"You can make up any word you want in conversation and if you use it in a dilsationary way, people rarely question the meaning."
"Why is golf named ""golf""? Because all the other fore letter words were taken (Thanks to /u/bonerfar... this now makes sense...)"
"Had my son's hearing tested because he's always yelling. Turns out he's just an asshole. :("
"I'll never forget the first time I had sex That's because I kept the receipt!"
"[Picking up girls] Me: you like bad boys, huh? Girls: yea Me to my wing man: tell them Wing man: he's just literally the worst"
"priest: ""does anyone here know why these two should not be wed?"" me: ""SHE LEAVES THE VOLUME ON ODD NUMBERS"" priest: [slowly closes bible]"
"My son said, ""Do you ever look at yourself in the mirror and think, 'My life has been a complete failure.'?"" I said, ""Not unless you're standing behind me."""
"I'd like to thank /r/jokes for teaching me so many jokes! I've always hated the sound of laughter..."