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Joke of the Day

"New rule: Confederate States don't get to pick who sings ""God Bless America"". We'll fly someone in from up north."

"A mom hassles her son to take out the garbage. the boys says ""sheesh, mom you tell me to do that at least once a week!"""

"What do a gynecologist and a pizza delivery boy have in common? They can both smell it, but they'll get fired if they eat it!"

"Just think if the kids that made Frosty the Snowman brought two carrots that day."

"My penis and I are really good friends but... We've never really seen eye to eye"

"How selfish am I? Circus peanuts and black licorice are my favorite candies just so I never have to share."

"What's worse than being raped by your dad's penis? Also being forced to fill his Viagra prescription."

"My donkey ate my Christmas tree...total pine in the ass."

"What did the casket say to the sick casket? Are you coffin?"

"Called a plumber out the other day. He was Chinese. Called a builder, he was also Chinese. Called an electrician out. He was Chinese as well ! Bloody Yellow Pages"