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Joke of the Day

"So all the primates got together for a male-only gathering, but they put up a sign banning humans. No homo."

"I'm the kind of friend who will help you hide a dead body, but if you betray me, just remember: I know how to hide a dead body."

"What did the allergic say after getting stung by a bee? ""Life's a bee-itch and then you die."""

"What is Shakespeare's favourite writing utensil? I don't know, but it was either 2B or not 2B."

"What is the similarity between Election and Erection? The words election and erection are spelled similarly. They both have the same meaning too: a dick rising to power."

"I try contributing to society but it keeps insisting I take it back."

"I told the sad ghost ten puns to raise his spirits... No pun intendid."

"Did you hear about the big marijiauna company scandal? They were putting drugs in there products"

"Why do baby clothes have pockets? I've never heard a baby say: ""cigarettes,phone and keys alright let's go"""

"Why did the black man wear a tuxedo to his Vasectomy? If he was going to be impotent he wanted to look impotent."