195082

Joke of the Day

"Why do women make such horrible capenters? Because for years men have telling them that |----------------| is 8 inches long."

"Why didn't the white officer shoot the black guy? Just kidding he did"

"My girlfriend just asked me.. What's an English geologist's favourite fruit? A pomegranate."

"A mushroom walks into a bar... The bartender says ""we dont serve your kind."" The mushroom replies ""but im a fungi!"

"What if a man existed w/one hand that's a steak and the other is lobster plus unlimited salad bar? This is the plot of ""Edward Sizzlerhands"""

"Some people get athlete's foot. I get Twitter butt."

"My dick was in the Guinness book of records... Until the librarian throw me out."

"What do you call a tin can that's done with High School? A graduated cylinder!"

"Every morning I run around the block 5 times... ...Then I slide the block back under the bed and go back to sleep"

"My boss noticed I shaved before coming in to the office today then he told me if i wanted to keep my job I would have to start keeping my pants on"