19503

Joke of the Day

"Q: What did the blonde do when she heard that 90% of accidents occur around the home? A: She moved."

"Yoda: *dies and fades away* Luke: Thank God. I was so sick of his backward talking. Ghost Yoda: Heard that, I did."

"A blind man walks into a bar ..and into a table and a chair."

"Did you hear about the mathematician who hated negative numbers? He'll stop at nothing to avoid them!"

"A German entrepreneur is opening up a new furniture department store. Word is, its going to be called Kikea."

"Girl, you're like a supermassive black hole... ...because you're incredibly dense, nothing is more attactive than you, and once you suck me in there's no going back."

"Before we talk about this very complicated topic, you should know that I read several sentences about it in an article once."

"Did you hear about the epileptic midget who works at the pizzeria? They call him Little Seizures."

"My colleagues call me the pussy slayer... I'm in charge of euthanising cats at the kennel."

"Buddy Valastro wears too much makeup. He seriously cakes it on. aaaaaand I'm leaving so fast I forgot my shoes."