193463

Joke of the Day

"What does a pediatrist do when you ask them which body part they find most interesting? They admit de feet."

"I lost 20 pounds in England last summer. How much is that in American dollars?"

"How do you make a woman scream for an hour after sex? You wipe your dick with her pillow"

"A smooth close shave with a brand new razor blade is the best feeling in the world! ... was not the best thing to say to my wife shortly after sex."

"What kind of pictures does a mermaid take on her phone? Shelfies."

"What do you call a hot chick in Boston? A tourist."

"I thought about getting two pets and naming them One and Two. So when One dies, I'll still have Two."

"Cashier at McDonalds said ""See you later"" a little too smugly at breakfast. I did not appreciate her condescension and told her so at lunch."

"The way to end up $1 Million using the stock market LEGIT invest 10 million into it"

"HOW MANY BABIES DOES IT TAKE TO PAINT A WALL? Well, since 1 baby could paint 0 walls, it would take infinite babies to paint a wall."