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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a dead IS fighter WAS fighter."

"Learn from the mistakes of others. You won't live long enough to make them all yourself."

"Alfred: About your girlfriend Catwoman... Batman: Yes, she's a thief, but- A: No, she pooped on the rug again. Right next to the litter box!"

"Don't say ""fuck"" in Japan They don't like it when you drop the bomb."

"How old is your Grandma? I dunno but we've had him a long time."

"Never ask white Americans what their ethnicity is unless you wanna hear a list of every European country and meaningless fractions."

"What's the difference between a useless golfer and a useless skydiver? The home golfer goes WHACK! ""Oh no!"" Whereas with the skydiver it's vice versa"

"What is your best North Korea joke?"

"The date had been magic. We moved to her couch & kissed. That's when horror struck as my eyes locked on the Duck Dynasty DVDs on her shelf."

"My girlfriend is really into space... So I've started calling my junk the ""Pillar of Creation""."