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Joke of the Day

"When dealing with women, you can either be right or get laid. You can't have both."

"What's the difference between a pot of glue, a tuna, and a guitar? You can tuna guitar but you can't guitar a tuna!"

"My friend overdosed on chill pills. On the plus side, he was by far the coolest person at the funeral."

"Why did the trout go to med school? Mounting pressure from his friends and family"

"Did you hear about the new corduroy pillows? They're making headlines!"

"Straight people... are fucking pussies."

"I named my dick Christmas Christmas came early"

"Why does everyone care who Tom Brady voted for? What we really wanna know is who Ja Rule voted for. WHERE IS JA?!"

"The US Defense budget is 40x bigger than NASA's. It's surprising we actually went to the moon instead of blowing it up."

"A man walks into a bar.... /r/im14andthisisdeep I might not be doing this right"