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Joke of the Day

"Donald Trump was born when someone put a pinkie ring in a bag of Cheetos and left it in a lightning storm."

"Someone on the New England Patriots is getting fired Whoever forgot to deflate the 12th ball"

"Why do they call them ""country bumpkins""? Because in the country, you bump your kin!"

"My sister is moaning and screaming because she's sick. Good thing that her boyfriend is there to comfort her."

"Can anyone tell me where the Aby Sea is? Someone said pirates can't learn the alphabet, but I be having some difficulties navigating through the Aby Sea part."

"you can tell the new mad max movie takes place in a lawless post apocalyptic hellscape because not one person used their blinker"

"The only thing more important than your happiness is mine so get on it."

"I don't know how to do my own taxes or understand how the stock market works, but definitely listen to my political opinions on everything"

"A woman is at her father's deathbed She hasn't seen him in years and now they only have a few moments left. ""Dad, I'm sorry,"" she whispers. ""Goodbye, Sorry,"" he says, ""I'm *dead*."""

"What do you call an Irishman with no arms and no legs who's rolling down a hill? Rick O'Shay."