19235

Joke of the Day

"I feel lazier than the guy who drew the Japanese flag."

"Women want to be equal to men in every aspect except dating. You all want the same positions in the rest of the world but still expect to be wined and dined. How about steaks and bjs for the guys."

"HEY DISNEY: If Cinderella's shoe fit so perfectly, why'd it fall off? Yeah, time to do some critical thinking."

"Spider-Man's a great addition to The Avengers, if they're looking for a superhero who is best at watching people they love die."

"I thought about starting a business selling halos... ...but the cost of overheads was too high."

"How do you know when an accountant's on holidays? He doesn't wear a tie to work and comes in after 8.30."

"Did you hear about the new Drake Beats Headphones? The softest headphones out there."

"What do you call a gay assassin? Ass ass in"

"Hey guy's I'm the titanic I would like to nominate all of my passengers and crew to do the ALS ice bucket challenge, you have 24 hours!"

"Women can't go to heaven Because God said there would be peace in heaven."