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Joke of the Day

"I remember the first time I saw my girlfriend, her hair was blowing in the wind, but she was too proud to run after it."

"What happened to the egg and his girlfriend? They broke up."

"Walked into the gym and did 1 push up in front of everyone, then ripped off my shirt and walked out grunting 'You did it. You did it.'"

"What did the cannibal do After he dumped his girlfriend Wipe his arse"

"Miley Cyrus is a strictly american phenomenon... most everywhere else in the world, she'd be Kilometery Cyrus"

"I'm going on a seafood diet for the holidays... that is, I see food and I eat it."

"remember blowing bubbles as a kid? good. you should call him, he misses you."

"I was told that exercise helps with your decision making. It's true. After going to the gym earlier I've decided I'm never going again."

"Don't fire till you see the whites of their eyes. OH MY GOD THEY'RE CHINESE!"

"How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side!"