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Joke of the Day

"Even saying ""I'm a virgin"" would sound badass if you bowled a strike right after."

"How do we know Jesus was a man? We've had to wait 2,000 years for his second coming."

"So I heard your mum is into fitness.. Fitness dick in her mouth"

"The best things in life are free. Stealing is awesome."

"I bought my friend a cat for their room. They said thank you I like cats. I said you're welcome me too. Cat said mewtwo."

"What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber? Nothing, you can't cross a vector with a scalar."

"A boy and his mother passed a cemetery. The boy saw a gravestone read 'Here lies an honest lawyer'. He said to his mother ""I thought Gandhi was cremated."""

"Today we gain an hour thanks to Day Light Savings Time. What are going to do with it? ....gotcha bitch!"

"What did the clerk say to the customer who tried to buy a candy bar with plastic quarters? This is non-cents!"

"I used to be brilliant at robotic dancing. I'm a bit rusty now though."