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Joke of the Day

"Philip Hughes joke 1 (warning: probably offensive to some) Did you hear Philip Hughes can't play a hook shot to save his life."

"Cop : ""Lets Do a drug test"" Me: ""Cool, which drugs are we testing?"""

"What has tiny balls and screws old ladies? A bingo machine you sick fuck"

"Just read that 4,153,237 people got married last year. Not to cause any trouble, but shouldn't that be an even number?"

"What's the cheapest meat to buy? Deer balls. They're under a buck."

"My girlfriend said she was leaving because of my obsession with The Monkees, i thought she was joking.. ..and then i saw her face."

"Why couldn't Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he 's married."

"What do you get if you cross teeth with candy ? Dental floss !"

"Why did the golfer wear two pairs of trousers?? In case he got a hole in one"

"*Obama approaches podium* Fellow Americans, I like cookies with raisins in them *press starts booing* They're good & healthy *Michelle nods*"