1902

Joke of the Day

"But if two men get married, they'll BOTH be stupid in detergent commercials and then no one will buy the correct detergent."

"I was once accused of stealing money from work. I didn't do it but it was nice to know management also thought I wasn't getting paid enough."

"What the heck does the ""z"" in ""LOLZ"" mean.... ""Laugh Out Loud.... Zebras?"

"I know they took some creative liberties with 'Noah' but I really wasn't expecting that Prius."

"Walmart stopped selling hoverboards due to safety concerns. In case you were curious about those empty shelves between the guns and the ammo"

"Women are like squirrels, very cute from a distance but will fight when you try to pick them up and get them in your car."

"I think someone may be sending me death threats. Woke up this morning with a [Tesco burger](http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-21038521) on my pillow!"

"People immediately behave better in traffic once they notice the Elf on the Shelf tied to my grille."

"What do you call a masculine Arab? Protein Sheikh"

"it's just so crazy to think that kids born in 14 will be turning 2000 this year"