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Joke of the Day

"I'm so lucky that I get to wake up every day and do what I love. (eat)"

"My daughter called Neapolitan ice cream ""three-way"" ice cream & I'm not sure I'll correct her cuz I'm a horrible person & it makes me laugh."

"Today we celebrate the birthday of a man who changed the way we see and understand the magic of the universe. Happy Birthday Isaac Newton."

"Arrogant lady, owned ! Lady : I wouldn't sleep with you if you were the last man on earth! Man : If I were the last man on earth, you wouldn't have a say in the matter."

"A fun gym game is to drag your treadmill behind someone else's, and then run with a determined glare while holding a bat."

"Dark humour is like food Not everyone gets it"

"What's Han Solo's favorite type of video game? First person shooter."

"Another Calculus Joke (Pun) Don't drink and derive!"

"I walked a girl down into the dark woods. She said it's very scary. I said how do you think i feel i have to walk back alone.."

"I am not going to joke about muslims and islam because.. I don't want the last thing I am going to hear to be: ""ALLAHU AKBAR!!"" and the sound of an explosion."