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Joke of the Day

"Women are like Gremlins, get them wet and they get into all sorts of trouble."

"Just told a girl who was getting too close we should just stay friens. In case you're wondering, I'll give her the d later"

"What did one rock pool say to the other rock pool? Show me your mussels."

"i hate it when Darth Vader puts eggs in my mailbox and then rides away on a kids tricycle"

"Inventor of the bar code dies at 91. Several burial attempts will be made before a manager is called to enter him into the ground manually."

"What do you do when Ronda says ""Not Tonight""? Kick her out of bed"

"what did they tell the eastern European tree who wanted a room at the hotel california you can czech in any time you want but you can never leaf"

"Step 1: Stay up late Step 2: Get up early Step 3: Hate the Earth"

"Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven? because it really looks like it did."

"Yesterday I went rollerblading, and I ran into batman. So I say ""Oy! Batman! Come skate with me! . . . "" But Batman just says ""I'M NOT WEARING HOCKEY PADS!"""