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Joke of the Day

"They should make fortune cookies with more obtainable fortunes: You will vacuum the living room. You will run into the coffee table."

"What is the only feeling that's worse than sitting on a cold toilet seat? Sitting on a warm one."

"I think Tuesdays are worse than Mondays. You can't use ""It's Monday"" as an excuse."

"German Did you hear about the new German microwave oven? It seats 25."

"Why do the Japanese have squinty eyes? Becuase atomic bombs are bright."

"What do you get when you cross a black and a mexican? Someone who's too lazy to steal."

"Old Wang says to his friend Old Chen It is so sweet, you have been married 50 years and you still call your wife 'sweetheart'. What is your secret? Chen says, ""it is because I have forgotten her name"""

"I hate people who support the Nazis They're such deutschbags."

"Boy, I hate small talk. *coworkers all grimace* He's right behind me isn't he? *Small talk starts cracking his knuckles*"

"The NSA is to blame for obesity in The United States. Because the camera ads 10 pounds."