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Joke of the Day

"What does a blueberry do at a party? The Anti-oxy-dance"

"A Mexican Magician... ...told his audience he'd disappear on the count of three. He began counting ""Uno, dos..."" And he disappeared without a tres."

"There's nothing like shaving off your beard to remind everybody why your face needed a beard"

"I'm going skiing in Colorado. They say there are a lot of blacks there. But there are a lot of blues and greens as well, so I should be okay."

"I wanted to do some light history reading this summer... ...so I read the biography of Thomas Edison."

"Whoever decided to print nutritional information on ice cream cartons should be arrested and tried for the murder of my happiness."

"I got a puppy for my ex. Fair trade."

"Life is like a pipette filler It sucks."

"Someone broke into my house last night and left a note saying they'd broken one of my keyboard keys. I onder hich one."

"Oppenheimer at the A-Bomb test saying ""Now, I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds"" only me exiting the bathroom after eating Taco Bell."