51983
Joke of the Day
"I got a puppy for my ex. Fair trade."
Next Joke
"The fabric of our lives? Why so epic, Cotton?"
"I'm so glad that Twitter keeps track of my number of posts. It is so refreshing to be able to properly quantify my wasted time."
"What do you get when you mix olive oil, lemon juice, rosemary, thyme, salt, pepper and marijuana? Cheech Marinade!"
"That moment when... ...you're on reddit too much and you say repost too often."
"Him: you are correcting my every word for the last six years of our marriage Me: for the last 7 years"
"I submitted ten puns to a pun contest to see which one would win.. No pun in ten did."
"[Wildebeest orbiting the earth in a spacesuit, uselessly kicking its legs madly every time a really grassy part comes into view]"
"I wanted to make a joke about quantum superpositions But I couldn't decide on one."
"What does dog poo and women have in common ? The older they get the easier they are to pick up."