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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a queer and a refrigerator? A refrigerator doesn't fart when you pull the meat out!"

"I really hate it when I have to go to work because my abundant wealth doesn't exist."

"A bear walks into a bar the bartender said ""What would you like?"" and the bear said ""I want... a beer please"" then the bartender said ""Why the big paws??"""

"When I punish my 16 I don't take away her phone I take away her charger and then I watch the fear in her eyes as her battery dies. It's fun"

"What did the urologist say to his patient who forgot to take his medication? Urine trouble!"

"A star walks into a ... A star walks into a black hole but doesn't seems phazed, the black hole turns to the star and says, I don't think you understand the gravity of this situation."

"What did the Irishman text his Wife? ""Honey I'm down at the pub having a pint with the lads. Be home in about 30 min. If I'm not back by then please read this message again."""

"A young couple are in the middle of an argument... Man: ""Yeah well, your hemorrhoids are disgusting!"" Woman: ""At least they stay out of my asshole!"""

"""We hug and kiss, but people just don't lick each other."" -yet another lie I just told my toddler"

"What is the difference between a flea and a wolf ? One prowls on the hairy and the other howls on the prairie !"