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Joke of the Day
"Hey street performer, try juggling life and a real job"
Next Joke
"You should never go grocery shopping when you're hungry and never go clothes shopping when you're naked."
"I don't think Jesus would be mad if he came back and saw what the world has become. He might be a bit cross, though."
"When I found out my girlfriend was having a baby my life really changed. specifically my name, address and phone number."
"It all The title says it all."
"How do you make a horse fast? You take away his food."
"What bleeds once a month in the mouth? Me, when I remember to floss once a month. Edit: account got hacked and showed something different. Sorry about that"
"Yo mama's so mean... She has no standard deviation."
"Two pubes sat on a toilet seat...nsfw One says to the other, ""how long are we going to stay here?"" The other says ""dunno, till we get pissed off I suppose""."
"Joe: $400? For ONE night? Innkeeper: It's the honeymoon suite. [outside] Joe: No rooms. Mary: None? Joe: Bummer, huh. That barn looks cosy?"