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Joke of the Day

"It all The title says it all."

"How long is a short circuit? As long as it takes to ***find*** it!"

"Where does a powerful king keep his armies? In his sleevies!"

"My wife was looking tired after giving blood I asked if she felt drained..."

"Abraham Lincoln. The reason I now have to hire a dishwasher instead of buying one."

"What is the one thing you don't give to a Jewish kindergartner? A gold star."

"Based on their level of excitement, bros in beer commercials seem unaware that you can pretty much buy beer anywhere."

"Can you imagine what would happen if Kate Middleton started doing porn? She would be *royally* fucked!"

"What's the difference between an egg and Elliot Rodger? An egg gets laid before it cracks."

"There must be a child in my rectum.... 'Cause you're kiddin' my ass!"