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Joke of the Day

"My friend asked me what I thought about Internet message boards. I said ""I'm all forum"""

"How do eels get around the seabed? They go by octobus."

"What is the key to being a successful and lucrative locksmith? There isn't one."

"The Comcast repairman asked if he could use my bathroom. I guess he had to cut some cable."

"Really the only advantage of a rainy day is that it is illegal to exercise."

"If I freeze, it's not a computer virus. I was just stunned by your beauty."

"They say a a dog is man's best friend, but I don't even have enemies that'll look me dead in the eye while taking a sh!t on my carpet."

"I like my women how I like my coffee Cold"

"Apparently SeaWorld CEO has declared an end to kissing and dancing for its performing Orcas... Now those whales will know how I felt at my high school prom!"

"Q: What do you call a loaf of bread when you cut off both ends? A: Endless Bread!"