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Joke of the Day

"[at oceanside seafood restaurant] Me: Is the fish fresh here? Waiter: Yes *from the kitchen, a fish blows me a kiss & waves seductively*"

Next Joke
 
"At the Karma Cafe, there is no menu you get what you deserve"
"Why doesn't Japan have elections? I dunno but it's probably the reason for their low birth rates."
"Do you know what Pinocchio and your dad have in common? They were both inside a whale."
"What do you get when you cross a rooster with a telephone pole? A ten foot cock that wants to reach out and touch someone."
"Scented toilet paper girlfriend: is this toilet paper scented? Me: I'm not sure; my asshole doesn't smell so good"
"Him: I just got stung. I'm allergic. Grab me my EpiPen. Me: Do you know how much those cost? Have a Benadryl."
"BUSINESS IDEA: CinnaBon-Iver. Delicious pastries filled with scarf scraps and broken pieces of wind chimes."
"idea: business cards that just say NO Sir can I have 5 mins of ur [card] Girl can I get ur number [card] BRO DID U STEAL MY NO CARDS [card]"
"My friend crashed his plane recently his life has been heading in a downward spiral."