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Joke of the Day

"dont read space facts to try to calm yourself down bc it doesnt work.for example the moon is not round it is shaped like an egg. im furious"

"6th grade nurse: do you play baseball Me: uhh why Nurse: your right arm is so much stronger than- Me: oh yeah! Yeah I play baseball so much"

"Lost my girlfriend due to religion I'm pretty much numb to beheadings at this point."

"What is mostly white, dull, and wants to be popular? This post."

"Did you hear about the hillbilly who asked his friends to give him their burnt-out light bulbs. He wanted to start a dark room."

"What do you call a girl with two dicks right by her face? Cockeyed. Thought of this one in LA traffic! Hope I made it up..."

"Disabled toilets... Ironically, the only toilets big enough to run around in."

"My friend told me I don't know the meaning of irony Which was really ironic because we were at a bus station."

"Cop: Sir, have you been drinking? Driver: Go, Pikachu! Thunderbolt! Cop: Sir, did you just throw a hamster at my head?"

"What do you get if you watch the Blind Side backwards? Oher's NFL career"