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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the hillbilly who asked his friends to give him their burnt-out light bulbs. He wanted to start a dark room."

"I like my women as I like my classical regression model estimators: consistent, efficient, and fucking unbiased."

"What did one casket say to the other casket? Is that you coffin?"

"I asked my mate what he was going to get his mum for Mothers' day. ""Nothing!"" he said. ""Why do they get a whole day to themselves, why can't we have a Son Day?"" We do mate, it comes after Saturday."

"If wine is considered the blood of Jesus, I don't blame those romans for killing him. That shit is delicious"

"My SO always wanted a Disney wedding... But aparently selling our memories of it to a demon was out of the question."

"Why did the Jew prefer to sleep in the dark? Because the lights in his house were contolled by a switch"

"Why did the noodle hide from the other noodles? Because he was Alfredo pasta!"

"It's the year 2354, the world is now like that futuristic Bruce Willis movie. No, the other one. No, the other one. No, the other one. No,"

"Netflix should double as a dating site and be like ""here are 9 other singles in your area that watched LOST for the past 11 hours."""