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Joke of the Day
"What did the Buddhist say to the hotdog vendor? Make me one with everything"
Next Joke
"I made a list on how to do an impersonation of Victor Meldrew a) Don't b) Leave it"
"If I ever found a unicorn it would probably only be about 5 minutes before I put it's horn in my mouth."
"I hate One Direction fans... Oscillating ones cool down a room much better."
"What's Dracula's car called? A mobile blood unit."
"An old lady standing in line at a bank machine asked me to help check her balance. So I pushed her over."
"A new type of product ! I opened a company selling land mines disguised as prayer mats. Prophets are going through the roof."
"Not one person is cooler than the pigeon that just walked all the way into this Mexican restaurant, gently picked up a taco chip, and left."
"My catchphrase is ""Just smell the money, baby"". I can't use it yet (I don't have money), please don't steal it"
"I have a ""One dollar, one inch"" rule with the ladies: you give me a dollar, you get an inch. You give me three dollars, you get it all."