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Joke of the Day
"How to stop a small dog from humping your leg. Pick him up, and suck his dick!"
Next Joke
"[at gym] me: [wiping down equipment after finishing with it] cute girl: you don't have to do that with the vending machine. are you crying"
"Trust Mom!"
"Driving a rental car means never knowing the safest place to wipe a booger without haphazardly finding someone else's."
"[gf takes pregnancy test, starts crying] ""It's negative"" Lemme see it [reads] 'Not prego. Just fat. And ugly' Wow that's really negative"
"A reporter asked Lil Wayne how sure was he that he contracted HIV. He said 100% positive"
"My 1-year-old stabbed a stuffed animal with a broken plastic spoon. She learned to fight in prison."
"We all have our weaknesses. Yours are just more obvious."
"God made them God made the little niggers, he made them at night. He made them in a hurry and forgot to make them White."
"I hate buying feminine products! How am I supposed to know if this is the right kind of broom or not? "