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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the guy who was arrested for indecent jurisprudence? He got off on a technicality"

"My wife said she wanted a divorce for Christmas. I told her I did not want to spend that much."

"Which star do the dinosaurs like best? The one that keeps getting bigger"

"Regular naps prevent old age, especially if you take them while driving."

"TIL that 9/10 Doctors agree , drinking water is good for children The tenth doctor lives in Flint, Michigan. EDIT: calm down /u/Andimbacksucker"

"Q: What does Shakespeare say when he is angry with his dog? A: Out, out, damned Spot!"

"JFK put a man on the moon Obama put a man in a woman's bathroom"

"White girls really love their Pumpkin Spice. Pumpkin spice lattes, pumpkin spice candles, pumpkin spice president!"

"Do you know why Caesar put lettuce in his salad? Oh, just cos."

"Did you get those pants on sale? Guy: Hey girl did you get those pants on sale? Girl: No why. Do they look bad? Guy: No cause they'd be 100% off at my place."