183853

Joke of the Day

"What does it mean when a blind girl says you have a big penis? She's probably just pulling your leg!"

"So my girlfriend thinks I'm stalking her. Well, she's not a my girlfriend but she will be soon."

"Why no, stranger, I CAN'T believe how early it gets dark now despite the fact this phenomena has occurred every single year of my existence."

"Instead of ""the John"" I decided to start calling my bathroom ""the Jim"" I needed to workout more. Now first thing in the morning I always go to the Jim!"

"Gravity makes a terrible friend. It's always holding you down."

"What's the difference between rape and extortion? How you spell blackmail"

"My buddy said he'd give his right arm to be ambidextrous I can only admire such dedication."

"How does a prostitute make more than a drug dealer? Because she can clean her crack and sell it again"

"I bought my girlfriend a fridge for her birthday. Not a great gift I know, but you should've seen her face light up when she opened it"

"Coworker: I was named after my grandfather. Me: Of course you were, he was born first."