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Joke of the Day

"Two drivers crash into each other. They both finish writing their texts before getting out of their cars to inspect the damage"

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"Laughed so hard tears ran down my leg."
"Caller ID should be more specific. It should say things like, ""Needs to borrow money"" or ""Will whine about petty stuff""."
"Me: I'm feeling frisky yet stabby. Do you want to come over? Him:... Me: Good answer"
"How to parallel park: 1) Park somewhere else."
"Whats the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted"
"I went to the doctor today and he told me to stop masturbating so much. ""Why?"" I asked. ""Because I'm trying to examine you."""
"What is Oedipus Rex's Mom's favorite Elton John song? Don't Let The Son Go Down On Me"
"How do you know your at a gay bbq? Hotdogs taste like shit"
"Finding a guy to marry who is rich enough to pay off my debt, but not so rich he wants a prenup is, like, so much harder than I anticipated."
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