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Joke of the Day

"I heard Apple is designing a new automatic car But they're having trouble installing windows"

"JUDY: What did the ghosts say to Santa Claus? MIKE: We'll have a boo Christmas without you."

"What do you call a fight between a human and a gorilla? A harumble."

"Damn girl are you today's date? Cause' you're a 10/10"

"Dipping your cats in blue paint and watching them chase each other is 1000x more entertaining than Avatar."

"What's the hardest part of telling a good gay joke? Keeping a straight face"

"Whats the difference between a hooker and a lawyer? The hooker stops fucking you when your dead."

"On a first date: Her - So what do you do? Me - I am currently working on eliminating all cancers. Her - Wow, that's impressive! Me - Then I'll move onto Capricons."

"After eating Thanksgiving at my house, my friends are always asking me how I prepare the turkey... ...easy, I tell the bird he is going to die."

"Human Cannonball Following the tragic death of the human cannonball at the local fair, a spokesman said, ""We'll struggle to get another man of his calibre""."