182022

Joke of the Day

"Jesus drove a Honda, but nobody knew about it. For I did not speak of my own accord. - John 12:49"

"It is unfair that girls mature faster than boys. Girls get their boobs at 13, and men get their boobs when they're in their 40's"

"""Was he better than me?"" ""Joe, don't."" ""I have a right to know!"" ""No, he wasn't better than you."" [god appears] ""Mary, what the hell?"""

"My bike is getting old. I had to retire it."

"How do you blind fold an asian? You put floss over their eyes!"

"I saw a UFO yesterday. So I quickly grabbed the worst camera I own to film it with."

"People will put up with a lot of crap, but if you respond to someone's text with, ""k"" you have just crossed a line."

"What did Sting get in Amsterdam? A massage in a brothel"

"My dvd got a scratch... so i used sandpaper to smooth it out"

"""Hey, I can see my house from here!"" - homeless people, almost all the time"