202052

Joke of the Day

"Despite the rumors, I actually don't have a problem with the new $20.... This country has a long history of trading black people for other goods."

"I have to go to twitter for my news because the news is too busy showing me tweets."

"What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter"

"*pokes forehead* Is this thing on ?"

"*Makes sure the new girl at work sees how much pineapple I eat at lunch* *winks*"

"I've had to take a second job working in a bakery. I knead the dough."

"The NFL has hired their first female referee. She will throw flags for penalties the teams committed 5 years ago."

"Every program I write is completely error-free No exceptions!"

"All units be on the lookout, suspect is armed with hunky shoulders, soft eyes and dreamboat hair. I don't even remember what he did anymore."

"Today I was given a box of Jamaican hair extensions.... It was dreadful"