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Joke of the Day

"Undressing with the curtains open is my little way of giving back to the old ladies in our neighborhood watch."

"Wanna hear a pizza joke? I can't tell it to ya, it's too cheesy"

"How do you titilate an ocelot? Oscillate its tit a lot."

"My mother taught me about reverse osmosis. ""Shut your mouth and eat your dinner."""

"My wife said she was divorcing me because I am obsessed with masturbation. I told her to go fuck herself"

"With all this media coverage about the clowns... I'll be so glad when the election is over."

"How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw plastic forks at her."

"Did you hear about the chameleon who couldn't change color? He had a reptile dysfunction."

"What does a man with no honey do? He cantaloupe."

"I was in a bar with my wife, and a girl tried to pick us up. She succeeded, but almost immediately we were back on the floor. We like it there."