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Joke of the Day
"How to eliminate world hunger and unemployment at once? Let the hungry eat the unemployed."
Next Joke
"Do they have a shitty attitude because they work for minimum wage, or work for minimum wage because they have a shitty attitude?"
"Dial 3 2 1 2 3 3 3 2 2 2 3 6 6 to get a beautiful rendition of ""Mary had a Little Lamb"""
"*leaves the kids w/ a new babysitter *calls to check on the sitter"
"Why did the superconductor eat all the pudding? It couldn't resist."
"What's the best way to announce that you're lactose-intolerant I'm allergic to Wait for it Dairy"
"Why didn't British explorers dig latrines? They had pith helmets."
"So I suggested to my wife that she'd look sexier with her hair back... Apparently it's an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient."
"The book I'm reading says ""4-6 years"" on the cover, but there's only like 6 words on each page. I'll be finished by the end of the week."
"Since the presidential race has literally a dick measuring contest... who would win the election if the election is decided by dick measurements? Hillary Clinton of course!"