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Joke of the Day

"If the backup sensor beeping in my car is keeping with the beat of the song I'm listening to I'm probably just gonna hit whatever it is."

"What happens when a cow jumps over a barb-wire fence? udder destruction"

"My friend called the movie Pixels the world's longest abortion Funny, I didn't realize it was a porno."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Bubbles ! Bubbles who ? Bubbles bangles and beads...!"

"Saying MILF... in an *incestous* family has a completely different meaning..."

"You don't need a parachute to go sky diving You need a parachute to go sky diving twice"

"What does a mathematician do about constipation? Sits down and works it out with a pencil."

"I bet you're the asshole that says ""we"" when talking about your favorite sports team like you're on the actual roster."

"its 2013 and mcdonalds still doesnt serve breakfast all day"

"What did the testicle say to the other testicle? ""Between you and me, I think something's up."" I'm slightly tipsy, this is probably a terrible joke. Merry Christmas!"