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Joke of the Day
"My dog smells... ...Like Philippino food."
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"[Meta] Anyone else hate jokes that are too long? They usually have too many characters."
"How do you titillate an ocelot? Oscillate its tit a lot."
"Your mama is so ugly She fell into a gorilla exhibit and got shot."
"how do we know that jews crucified Jesus? they used one nail for both legs"
"ME: Is it true you can smell diseases? MY DOG: Yes ME: Well do I have any? MY DOG: Yes, you're insane ME: Wow you can smell that? MY DOG: No"
"Ordered a pumpkin spice latte this morning and now I have bangs and work at Anthropologie."
"Doubt this is welcome in /r/ShowerThoughts but thought of it there. How many rascist Drink names can we collectively think of? I'll edit the best ones into this post. Mine was ""*White Power*-ade""."
"I just drank some honey wine I'm feeling pretty buzzed."
"I taught my son how to spell beer so he'd stop bringing me Pepsi from the fridge."