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Joke of the Day

"Remember, I'm not an idiot...I just play one on-OH CRAP I'M ON FIRE! GUYS, HELP! I'M ON FIRE AGAIN! Oh wait...this is just an orange shirt."

"Christmas cards are how old people say, ""Hey, you thought I was dead, but I'm not!"""

"I'll need a weekend to recover from this weekend."

"What did ataturk's Father Say to him when he did well? Adda-Turk"

"Recent studies have shown that 63% of women have used vibrators. The other 37% have brand new ones."

"An elderly man was quite unhappy"

"My New Year's Resolution is to lose 10 pounds Only 13 more to go"

"Who is the coolest person in the hospital? The ultrasound man."

"I tried to make a clock with no battery for the digital clock competition but it didn't count."

"A dad walks into his daughter's room and saw her fapping with a cucumber, he said: Hey! I was going to eat that, now it's going to taste like cucumber!"