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Joke of the Day

"How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2, unless they're small enough to fit a third in there."

"I burnt my Hawaiian pizza today Should have cooked it on aloha teperature"

"Falling in love makes you do stupid things. Once I even got married."

"What is a geometry teachers favorite movie? Angles in the Outfield"

"The Internet is the world's greatest source of things you don't really need."

"What disease do Spartans get the most? Leon-itis."

"another bar joke a duck walks into a bar wearing a shoe. the bartender says, ""so you lost a shoe?"" and the duck says, ""no, i found one"""

"My wife nominated me to do the ice bucket challenge. I'm a little confused. Has anyone else been asked to hold a toaster at the same time?"

"No plastic surgeon will help me! I have really giant hands and I'd like to make them smaller, but every time I ask the doctor for a hand-job I get kicked out."

"I thought reverse psychology was when.. you made your therapist cry"