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Joke of the Day

"Before an army officer can get married, they need to know the rules of engagement."

"I don't know where you got your face from but i hope you have the receipt."

"Are you today's date? Because you're 1/10, bye."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? .... because Bernie Sanders challenged him to a debate about the future of America."

"See ya later, alligator. After a while, crocodile. Catch ya manana, little iguana."

"Lois Lane would probably be terrible at picking out the right suspect in a Police lineup."

"My favorite part of Zumba is mortgaging my house to pay the chiropractor."

"I just had sex with Jesus Christ I wasn't prepared for his second coming."

"Why is Microsoft going straight to Windows 10? Because 7.. 8.. 9"

"Dawn's coming over. ""Dawn from work, or crazy Dawn?"" *Dawn walks in* ""WELL WELL WELL, if it isn't the lady I'm framing for murder."