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Joke of the Day

"Dawn's coming over. ""Dawn from work, or crazy Dawn?"" *Dawn walks in* ""WELL WELL WELL, if it isn't the lady I'm framing for murder."

"Why aren't there any jokes about the Jonestown massacre? The punch line takes too long."

"Bad timing for an excuse Teacher: Why were you late? Pupil: Sorry teacher I overslept. Teacher: It's three in the afternoon!"

"why don't chickens wear underwear... Because their peckers on their face."

"The largest city in the world is... Dublin. Because it keeps on Dublin and Dublin"

"How do you get 50 Canadians out of a swimming pool? ""Please get out of the swimming pool"""

"Twitter drama doesn't have anything on LinkedIn drama."

"McDonald's is like if Ke$ha were a restaurant."

"For a quiet ride, buckle the empty seatbelt beside a child and tell them not to wake up the ghost."

"I may not show up to work on time, but dammit I leave early."